Hope everyone had a super 4th of July! Even if you are in a country where the 4th of July is just another day. During my 4th festivities, I won first place in a dessert contest! Considering the cooks I was up against, I'm feeling pretty major right now.
I wanted to make a speech but they were all "take your ribbon and shut your pie hole." Or maybe I was accidentally in the wrong place and didn't even hear the winner announcement and later somebody started to sing "there she is, Miss America" and I was thinking to myself weird, but so very true and everyone should sing when they see me when that same someone noticed my I'm thinking things face and said "you won the dessert contest, dummy." (Except she didn't say dummy. I know you were thinking it, Carrie.) So, I'm giving my speech here. Now.
<lots of waving and kiss blowing> First, I'd like to thank my parents for always allowing sugar and butter in
my faceour home. My parents couldn't be here with us today because they have gone on to a better place. Colorado. Thanks mom and dad!
I'd also like to thank Pinterest for teaching me that regular pie is a joke and real women make tiny pies in cute jars and stick flags in them.
To Elmer's Glue - I wish I hadn't used knock-off glue to make the tiny flags to stick in the tiny pies that I had made in tiny jars. That junk took hours to dry.
To the contest judges -
the Benjamins I slipped you prior to the contest must remain a secret or I swearYou guys! Really. <make a heart with my fingers>
To my sister, Sarah, I sure am glad we didn't roll backwards down that hill into that car.
Thank you. I love you all. Autographs are $5.
How was your 4th of July?