Thursday, May 3, 2012

Things I'm Afraid To Tell You

Inspired by this post by Jess at Makeunder My Life, Ez at Creature Comforts challenged the blogging community: write a Things I'm Afraid To Tell You post. There is a big disconnect between real life and what many bloggers write about. Our feeds say that we are always happy and everything is always pretty. We think this is a service but sometimes it makes others feel inadequate. I know I've had that feeling once in a while after catching up on my favorite blogs.

This does not mean that Whitfield Awesome should become a run-down of my everyday life. I'm not going to write about laundry (which I don't do often enough) or every time I'm sad (which I am too often). I'm just going to get down to the nitty gritty with you. At least this once. This also does not mean that I am walking around in despair. I have a lot of great things going for me and love my life. On with the show...


I want to live off of my
creative abilities instead of working an 8-to-5, but don't believe I ever will.

I want to publish a book but don't believe I ever will.
I want to get married and have a baby but don't
 believe I ever will.


When someone nearby laughs, I always think they're laughing at my weight.
I hate how pale I am.
I think my cheekbones are totally whack. 


I don't always take care of the dishes before bed.
One of my extra bedrooms is full of boxes (I closed on the house 8 years ago this month).
I have social anxiety but also don't like being home alone.


I'm a Christian but don't act like it enough.
I'm the best person I know at being in denial
I'm an enabler.

I act tough but get hurt easily.
I rarely feel accepted.

cried while I typed this post.


How about you? If you have a blog, are you up to the challenge? Want to make a confession in the comments? You could always confess something anonymously. Sometimes it feels good just to say it "out loud".

8 comments:

  1. I think you should feel brave and confident for sharing your confessions.

    Mine: I'm having trouble coming up with a secret to share. And it's not because I'm lacking any...it's cause I'm a big sissy.

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  2. Aww, this was a tough challenge for many if not all of us. It took forever for me to hit send, but I'm glad I got it out and I'm glad others were brave enough to do so, too. Thanks for opening up!

    I struggle with some of the same things you do about marriage, kids, and goals I'm scared I'll never accomplish because I'm not good enough.

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  3. Though these things are hard to admit to myself and amazingly difficult to admit to others, I actually feel a bit of relief putting them out there.

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  4. Doing these kinds of posts feel strange, don't they?! It's good though, it helps people understand your voice more when you soley 'know' them online.
    Thanks for sharing and have a good weekend! xo

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  5. I'm with you on the wanting to get married/have a baby but thing but don't think you ever will. I also relate to the wanting to live off my creative abilities, but again not believing in my capability to ever do so.
    I have to tell you, I am really inspired and appreciate your willingness to participate in this. I think it is such a cool idea and much needed, because so many times blogs seem to only focus on the perfect. I was going to participate too but I don't post in my blog very often so I feel like a post like this would be too heavy and out of the blue. But I will confess something here, right now. Hmm let's see. Well I'm obsessed with time and how I spend it, like so much that it gets in the way of having friends and relationships with people. I also don't have a single friend I feel like I could call up and hang out with because I pushed all my friends away after struggling with an eating disorder, which I have struggled with for the past 4 years.
    Was that heavy enough for you? ha, it does feel good to get it out though. I've never told anyone that before. I just kind of hope that no one from my "real life" ever sees this.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you for sharing. I'm glad it felt good to let it out in a safe place where perhaps no one from your real life will see it. It's kind of amazing how blogging can feel so personal and intimate AND so separate and pretend.

      [I feel you on the time obsession, btw.]

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  6. Man. If people knew my insides they'd really think we were twins because a lot of your things you don't tell people are my things too. I guess that is just part of what makes us such good sister friends.

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  7. I'm amazed at how many feel the same things. Why do we always feel like we are alone, when almost everyone has the same anxieties, and can totally relate? Thank-you for sharing!! It's been amazing to read all these blogs that have participated!

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